The Naughty Nuns

This is a song that I wrote with my friends when we were about 14.

All those damn naughty nuns,

Getting fat on chocolate buns.

All those damn naughty nuns,

They will weigh many tonnes.

Sister Kate she looked so sweet,

But she went flashing down the street.

She said it was ‘coz of heat,

But we know who she hoped to meet.

All those damn naughty nuns,

Bathing topless in the sun,

All those damn naughty nuns,

They just wanna have some fun.

Sister Judy, Sister Fay,

Played a trick on Brother Ray.

Put up a poster saying he’s gay,

And he got hit on by Brother Clay.

All those damn naughty nuns,

Sayin’ things about their mums.

All those damn naughty nuns,

What they say would make you stunned.

Sister May, Brother Lance,

They were caught without their pants.

They said it was ‘coz of ants,

But they were doin’ a diff’rent dance.

All those damn naughty nuns,

To confession they all run.

All those damn naughty nuns,

Sister Claire just had a son.

Sister Susan, Father Ted,

Just got caught in the same bed.

She was also seen with Ned,

That’s what all the neighbours said.

All those damn naughty nuns,

Having fun with their huns.

All those damn naughty nuns,

I think she really wants some.

All those damn naughty nuns,

Putting fingers up their bums,

All those damn naughty nuns,

Doin’ it until they come.

What would our parents have said?!